ENM and Polyamory Competent Therapy in Woodland Hills and Online Across California
I provide affirming, culturally competent therapy for polyamorous individuals, couples, polycules, and consensually/ethically non-monogamous (CNM/ENM) relationship systems. Grounded in existential therapy, mindfulness practices, and over 30 years of community engagement, I offer a non-judgmental space where your relationship structure is respected, understood, and never pathologized.
Non-Pathologizing Care: Your Relationship Model is Not the Problem
A common friction point for non-monogamous individuals seeking mental health care is having their relationship structure treated as the implicit cause of every issue. In my practice, ENM or polyamory is never made the focus of therapy unless you explicitly choose to make it one. If you are seeking therapy for anxiety, executive functioning, career shifts, or individual growth, your relationship style remains your baseline, not a clinical target to analyze or fix.
Affirming Support for Exploration and Relational Growth
When you do choose to focus on your relationship structure, I provide specialized guidance to help you explore, open up, or refine your dynamics on your own terms.
| Focus Area | Relational and Clinical Focus | Therapeutic Outcome |
|---|---|---|
| Opening Up and Relationship Restructuring | Transitioning from monogamy to ENM, exploring polyamory, or defining relationship anarchy. | Clear agreements, mutual agency, and reduced anxiety during structural shifts. |
| Jealousy, Fear, and Compersion | Deconstructing societal monogamy scripts, processing jealousy, and cultivating emotional safety. | Somatic emotional regulation, increased trust, and authentic self-awareness. |
| Polycule Communication and Time Management | Balancing multiple partnerships, calendar scheduling, nesting dynamics, and family integration. | Sustainable scheduling systems, clear boundaries, and reduced burnout. |
| Desire Discrepancies and Intimacy | Navigating sexual alignment, desire shifts, and emotional connection across multiple partners. | Open, sex-positive dialogue and renewed physical and emotional trust. |
My Clinical Approach to Consensual Non-Monogamy
I combine lived cultural understanding with advanced clinical frameworks to support authentic, non-traditional relationship systems.
- 30+ Years of Community Competency: With over three decades of involvement in alternative relationship communities, I speak your language. You will never need to spend therapy time explaining basic terms like kitchen table poly, hierarchy, solo polyamory, or nesting partners, for example.
- Structural Relationship Mapping: I use a customized Relationship Structure Template to help partners explicitly define agreements, boundaries, and communication rules, if desired and appropriate. Additionally, I use a Relationship Map (a genogram focused on non-monogamous relationships) to map complex relationship structures, if needed.
- Pursuit of AASECT Certification Track Training: My clinical focus on human sexuality ensures advanced, informed support for complex intimacy dynamics.
- Comprehensive Coordinated Care: I proactively advocate for and utilize Releases of Information (ROIs) to consult with your other therapists (individual or relational) or care teams when appropriate, keeping your overall care aligned.
Core Principles of Non-Monogamous Affirming Care
- Non-Centered Baseline: We focus on your stated goals without scapegoating your choice to practice non-monogamy.
- Proactive Communication: Developing concrete language to negotiate agreements and handle conflict directly.
- Complete Structure Inclusivity: Validating all consensual dynamics, from polyfidelity and triad structures to solo polyamory and relationship anarchy.
Compliance Notice: Compliance Notice: Andrew Robertson, AMFT# 158068 (under the supervision of Melissa Volchok, LMFT #120203).
